ProgKing's comfort zone lies somewhere between the laconic and the non-verbaI, so I hope he enjoys this silly puzzle. I hope you do too!
Given the difficulty this puzzle seems to have created for solvers, please check my note of 3/16/18 for additional hints. And please BE SURE TO CHECK CERTITUDE FOR IMPORTANT INFO!
Congratulations to Alzarius for First To Solve, JAF430 for STS, and Loco Onos for TTS and First to Find!
The FTF should TAKE A HIKE of about 60' at a bearing of about 165 degrees for a little treat.
Given the continued difficulty this little puzzle seems to be posing (the Cert counter is now 3/155), this MORNING it HAS occurred to me that I need to take drastic measures or this terrrible, horrible, no good, very bad streak will never be BROKEN. I can't think of exactly what to do, however, to make this puzzle as easy as I'd intended it to be. So I will have to ponder my dilemma before posting a THIRD VERSION of helpful hints.
You can validate your puzzle solution with certitude.
