I'm a bit worried about Gerald Mystery Cache
I'm a bit worried about Gerald
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Difficulty:
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Terrain:
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Size: 
(micro)
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THE CACHE IS NOT AT THE
LISTED COORDINATES
PROBABLY BEST YOU NOT GO THERE
The other day I received a strange letter in the mail from my main
caching partner of late, a tiny and quite elderly Rastafarian named
Gerald. It seems to be a set of instructions. Or not. I'm really
not sure. What on Earth could it mean? I'm sure it relates to
geocaching, because that's all Gerald ever thinks or talks
about.
His handwriting is terrible, so I've retyped the message below. I
hope you can help me figure this out ...
CRAFT A HULL MON
HONK AT POLLY
READ FAST MY DEAR HULK
AFTERWARDS FREEZE TREE FARTS
BE HOLY ACT JOLLY
EAT PULP
CREATE A SCAB MILL
REVERE YON INKY HOMILY
FACE WEST YOU SEE DEFEAT AWARE
AFTER WARS EAT NO WARTED PLUM
BASTE NO MINION
CREATE JOY CREATE GREAT ILL
FEAR GREAT RATS AFTER MILLION PILL PLOY
ACT PHONY
A "scab mill"? "Tree farts"? "Warted plums"? And just who the heck
is "Polly"? Weird stuff, even coming from
occasionally-not-clear-headed Gerald.
Please do let me know if you can make hide or hair of this ... I'm
most befuddled. And I'm a bit worried about Gerald.
You can check your solution to this puzzle on
geochecker.
Additional Hints
(Decrypt)
Znepu 2011 uvag: Vtaber Trenyq naq whfg sbphf ba nyy-pncf grkg.
Ncevy 2011 uvag: Abg fher vs V yrsg evtug glcr bs uvag va Znepu.